猫の気持ち 其の四


 振り返って見ると、リビングの入口に寝巻きへと着替えた舞子さんが戻って来ているではないですか。
 動画サイトにすっかり気をとられていたので全く気付かなかったでござる。こいつはまずいにゃあ、このままではせっかくの仕込がバレてこれまでの苦労が無に帰してしまう。
 くっ……こうなったら。
 吾輩は偉大なるゼタイ騎士のごとく、肉球で盲滅法にパソコンの鍵盤を叩きまわし、玩具と戯れているフリをすることにした。
「オラオラオラァ、さっさとブルーセイバー出せやコラァ」
 さりげなくAlt+F4の同時押しも混ぜつつ、後は野となれ山となれ。安心して逝くがよいぞ。
「コラ、ダメよゴロちゃん。パソコン壊れちゃうじゃない」
「何を寝ぼけたことを言っておるのだ舞子しゃん。見てのとおり壊そうとしておるのだ、止めてみよ止めてみよ止めてみよー」
 舞子さんがあわてて吾輩の方へと駆け寄り、すかさず両脇を抱え上げて吾輩とパソコンを引き離してしまった。
「もー、しょうがない悪戯好きねぇ、あんたは」
 フフフ、あまい、あまいなあ舞子さん。この状態では四つの足は届かなくなってしまったが、まだ吾輩にはもう一つ武器が残っておるのだ。食らえ、尻尾スクリーニングの刑じゃ。
 吾輩は唯一残された武器をパソコンの鍵盤へと叩きつけ、そのまま右へ左へと振るい回す。
errttyyuui;hhjssdjklk;:34567890-^^nzxfghjjhsfgwertyy[kxcvbn,/zxoioiuuuertyup@p@46578@;rtyyuuiioxdcvbn\/,mmn fyuioiortyuuii@a@iuyfvhjkm,lffsdfghjkkl@oie45rt68980-^[@oiuyytrwesd:nbzzxcvbnm,./;lkjhwertyuiuo/zcX34edrf890-;lkjhgfd3sw4ed5r678,kmnffds3swertdfyuhijooiuwqZWAsxdcfvgbnm,;plo97i68urewwzsxfdcgvhbjnkm;l,:.]:k67j5u6he5wtqwa35sxxrctyvbguhnmj,.08675645g4fzxetrcdytvubnlm;,:;]:o98657643gqaxswtcrytfuvybgnmll89k6j756h45g34qxtcrdfgvjbknlm;l097867j56h4gwq
「あっ、またやってる!」
 舞子さん、今度は吾輩を片手でさらに天高く顔のあたりまで抱き上げると、空いた方の手でノート型パソコンの蓋をパタリと閉じてしまった。クックック、上手く行ったでござる、完璧だ。
 仕上げに猫なで声で鳴きながら未練がましく手足をじたばたさせておこう。
 もはや文字通り手も足も出ない状態になってしまったのであるが事態はこれで収まったわけではない。吾輩は再び両手で脇を抱え上げられると、くるりと向きを反転させられ舞子さんと正面から対峙させられる。当然その表情は眉が釣り上がったお仕置きモードである……。
「ダメだって言ってるでしょう。パソコン壊れちゃったらどーするのよ」
「まあまあ、そう怒りなさるな舞子さん。たとえ壊れてしまったとしても、明日の昼くらいには最上位機種の新型を買い直してもお釣りが来るくらいの含み益が出ているじゃろうて」
 猫語で弁明しても舞子さんには無意味であろうが、事情を説明して許しを請う姿勢は大事である。
「これはあたしが仕事で使う大切な商売道具なの。ゴロちゃんの座布団でもないんだからね、悪戯したり上に座ったりしてもダメなの。分かった?」
「へいへい、承知致しましたでござる」
 クリクリとした大きい瞳がジッと吾輩を見据えている。お怒り状態の表情も凛々しく美しい、Oh、もっと叱り付けて下さいませ舞子姫。
「さ、今日はもう遅いから私と一緒にお布団で寝ましょうね」
 吾輩を胸元へがっちりと抱え込んで寝室へと向かう舞子さん。なんとかバレずに仕込みを完了することは出来たのであるが、吾輩は明日の朝までこのまま舞子さんの懐から解放されることは無さそうである。ついにお縄頂戴になった脱獄犯と言ったところであろうか。
 少々窮屈ではあるがこれも仕方なし、今日のところはこのまま猫を被っておとなしくしておくことにしよう。
 長い一日であったが無地に新しい主と巡り合うことができた。吾輩もちょっと疲れてしまったので今夜はぐっすりと眠って精力を蓄えてから活動を再開するのである。

“猫の気持ち 其の四” への35件の返信

  1. I don’t drop many remarks, however i did some searching and
    wound up here 猫の気持ち 其の四 – 極楽行業.
    And I do have 2 questions for you if you usually do not mind.
    Could it be only me or does it appear like a few of these
    remarks look like they are written by brain dead individuals?
    😛 And, if you are posting at other social sites, I’d like to follow
    everything fresh you have to post. Could you make a list of every one of all your community pages like your linkedin profile, Facebook page or twitter feed?

    Feel free to visit my page: how to seduce your women

  2. I?m amazed, I must say. Rarely do I come across a blog that?s equally educative and amusing, and without a doubt, you’ve
    hit the nail on the head. The problem is something which not enough folks
    are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy that I came
    across this in my hunt for something concerning this.

    Feel free to visit my webpage … buy junk cars

  3. you are truly a excellent webmaster. The website loading speed is amazing.
    It sort of feels that you’re doing any unique trick.
    Moreover, The contents are masterpiece. you’ve performed a excellent process on this subject!

    Feel free to visit my website :: joker slot online

  4. Hey There. I discovered your weblog using msn. This is
    a very neatly written article. I will make sure to bookmark it and
    return to learn extra of your helpful information. Thank you for the post.

    I’ll definitely comeback.

    my page slot via pulsa

  5. Wow that was unusual. I just wrote an incredibly long comment but after I clicked submit my comment didn’t appear.

    Grrrr… well I’m not writing all that over again. Anyhow,
    just wanted to say fantastic blog!

  6. I cling on to listening to the news update speak about getting free online grant applications so I
    have been looking around for the top site to get one. Could you
    advise me please, where could i acquire some?

    Look into my blog – u pick salvage

  7. Wow, amazing blog format! How lengthy have you ever been running a blog for?

    you make blogging glance easy. The total glance of your website is excellent, let alone the content!

    Here is my web page – judi s128

  8. Hmm it seems like your site ate my first comment
    (it was extremely long) so I guess I’ll just sum it up what
    I wrote and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog.
    I as well am an aspiring blog writer but I’m still new to the whole
    thing. Do you have any helpful hints for beginner blog writers?
    I’d genuinely appreciate it.

    my webpage; car covers

  9. First off I want to say excellent blog! I had a quick question in which I’d like to
    ask if you don’t mind. I was curious to find out how you center yourself and clear your thoughts before writing.
    I’ve had difficulty clearing my mind in getting my thoughts out there.

    I do take pleasure in writing however it just seems like the first 10
    to 15 minutes are usually wasted simply just trying to figure out how to begin.
    Any ideas or tips? Cheers!

    Here is my page: buy auto parts from junkyard

  10. Thanks for your own hard work on this website.
    My mother enjoys conducting internet research and
    it’s really obvious why. A number of us learn all relating
    to the dynamic manner you deliver insightful thoughts by means of this web blog and therefore
    strongly encourage response from visitors on that situation then our favorite child is certainly being taught a great deal.
    Have fun with the rest of the year. Your conducting a really
    good job.[X-N-E-W-L-I-N-S-P-I-N-X]I’m extremely impressed
    along with your writing talents as neatly as with
    the structure on your blog. Is this a paid
    subject or did you modify it yourself? Either way keep up the excellent quality writing, it’s uncommon to see a nice blog like this one today.

    Also visit my page … engine gasket

  11. It’s actually very complex in this busy life to listen news on TV, therefore
    I just use web for that reason, and get the latest news.

  12. Have you ever thought about adding a little bit more than just your articles?
    I mean, what you say is valuable and everything.
    Nevertheless think of if you added some great images or videos to give your posts
    more, “pop”! Your content is excellent but with images and videos,
    this site could certainly be one of the very best in its field.
    Wonderful blog!

  13. Howɗy just wanted to give үou a quick heads up.
    The text in your article seem to be running off the screen in Ie.
    I’m not suгe іf this is a formаttіng issue or something to
    do with web browser compatibility but I figured I’d post to let you
    know. Thе design look grеat though! Hope you get the issue гesolved soon. Cheers

  14. Hi my family member! I wish to say that this article is amazing, great written and include approximately
    all vital infos. I’d like to look more posts like this .

  15. You made some really good points there. I looked on the internet
    for additional information about the issue and found most people will
    go along with your views on this web site.

コメントを残す

メールアドレスが公開されることはありません。